Happy Hour.

I haven't forgotten about Simon and Arthur. We last saw them in the lobby of the Landmark Hotel, Bangkok. Old friends meeting after many years.

‘Arthur!’ Simon exclaims, ‘you look great!’

Yeah, yeah. Arthur knows this to be something of a professional exaggeration but he goes along with it. Simon does the introductions. 

‘Arthur this is Quentin, my producer. And Giles, my cameraman. Arthur is an old school friend. He lives in Thailand. He’s going to show us the sleazy underbelly right Arthur?’

It’s all happening a bit fast for Arthur. ‘Can we have a quiet chat first?’ he asks.

‘Good idea. Let’s go somewhere for a beer.’

They find a place overlooking the street behind a rustic barricade, pieces of tree conjoined with old wagon wheels. Quentin and Giles say something about ladyboys and wander off.. Simon and Arthur are soon approached by a waitress who asks them what they want to drink.

‘Beer I think,’ says Arthur. Simon concurs. Two Singha beers duly arrive.

‘This place,’ says Arthur indicating their immediate surroundings, ‘has an interesting history. Once upon a time, during the Vietnam War, it was a small restaurant popular with US soldiers. Later it became Tom’s Quick, a nice place to read the Bangkok Post over breakfast after bidding farewell to one’s companion of the night. Now as you see it has become a bar for off-duty punters. Though the waitresses are open to offers. It is well located. Some enterprising Thai saw the potential for a daytime hangout within walking distance of the Nana Hotel, that large building over there, and Nana Entertainment Plaza which is behind us and which we will visit later.’

‘That’s very good Arthur. Exactly the kind of background we need. We may not have time for all of it though.’

‘What’s the documentary about? Surely it’s all been done before.’

‘Don’t worry. We’ll come up with a new twist. Basically we shoot a lot of footage and I interview a few people. Stereotypes, that’s what we’re looking for. The real work is in the editing. By the time my producer gets through with it we’ll have this place looking like Sodom and Gomorrah.’

‘And me? What do I do?’

‘Recommend the best places to go basically. I do the commentary and the Jeremy Clarkson jokes.’

‘You’re not thinking of bringing cameras are you? You’ll get lynched.’

‘Oh we’ll be discrete. It’s amazing what you can do with smart phones.’ 

Hmm. Arthur isn’t sure this documentary about Bangkok nightlife is really for him. It all sounds a bit tacky. He was hoping for something more along the lines of Michael Palin. He's starting to feel like a pimp.

‘People want things more edgy now,’ says Simon, ‘it’s getting hard to shock anyone. We have to push the envelope.’

They watch the go-go girls getting dropped off by young Thais on motorbikes. They are closely observed by men in the bar. These, Arthur explains, are the customers.

'Who exactly are they?' Simon asks. 

‘The customers? Oh all kinds. Some are looking for a quick screw. Some want a girlfriend experience. Some fall in love. And they aren’t all lonely middle-aged men by any means. Lots of young blokes in Bangkok these days, doing IT jobs, teaching English. They all succumb.’